Resurrection of a Failed Heart

We start like this, there is mist in the air, and clouds hanging as low as your knees, you walk out into the open just to see a plain vast ocean of white darkness. You stop. Wait to discover if there is anything you can comprehend by your normal senses. But unfortunately you realize that it is just plain fog. Plain white darkness.
Now come back, today, the morning of this beautiful summer day, somehow you think what is wrong going around? You are doing your best still there is a condensed pound of failure that burdens your heart leaves you sighing. Somehow lonely by the fact that there is not much left to do, not much left to see, no chances of a future amendment, though, the present is not that regretful, you stay aloof.
We then return to the inner mind of the reader. I ask you. Who do you think is writing this?
Rather feeling all that has been tried to describe in the most humble manner possible. At first sight this may seem to be the notes of a housewife, failed by the shackles of daily responsibilities, maybe, it is a middle class clerk, trying to bring out his chances of promotion but unsuccessful every time by means that neither he nor people willing to help can understand. Rather this can even reflect the thoughtful mind of a retired 65 year old man, perhaps unsuccessful in fulfilling what he wanted to present to his succeeding generations.
After all this lot of character linking, let me bring you to the truth. This is no housemaid deprived of luxury, no clerk typing on a noisy 1975 Xerox, nor a man of an age that leaves him breathing on medicines. It’s me. A boy, merely 18 years in age, Dreaming, for he is told, this is what brings success, working for he is told, that is what will help you earn a living. A boy, stuck somewhere as he fights back with all his power to every challenge he is given.
He does Vince each time in a dramatic way; for he feels that the calm after a storm indicates that it’s gone. But no. It stays there. The chain of peers won’t stop the pressure that is put upon, though now doesn’t bother him. Not because he knows how to cope, but because he has gone habitual. He has started thinking in ways that he never used to do. Escapism has become the last solace. Every day seems to be prison; every night’s dream a jail break.
We are now not just children of hope. We are rather personas with a profound frustration. Our reluctance to work can somehow be linked to what we are feeded upon, given in terms of intellectual correspondence with the environment around us. All we think is a living with luxury, all we want is peace, and all we think we deserve is the ultimate. The existence of satisfaction has started becoming one of the most exotic feelings you can imagine. And all that because, every time we fail we find ourselves in a two dimensional arena, selection of one being mandatory. Either we subdue ourselves to what we have now or stride for the better. Most of us prefer getting up once again, but unfortunately, the reason of our failure was never the lack of the attempt. It was the attempt itself. The type of paths we are subjected to just do not put forward the right means to express ourselves in a way we think is the best and that actually be right in most of the cases.
This leaves most of us disheartened, failed for we find no other way and start hating everything we see. Finally all this leads to that same cloud of white thick fog. Clear, yet disappointing.
And the spiral goes on, all day long. We turn finally to the other dimension. We accept what we are and that is what leads to incompetent and non-developing citizens of such a productive country.
So let’s put a call on all those who don’t think they can, on all those who are truly disheartened, let’s give them a smile by saying that there is life beyond three hours of paper scribbling, there is sunshine outside the windows that enclose knowledge, abstaining wisdom, a place you always hated to be. This is the new tomorrow that we can make, where there is no competition, no failures, just a need for trails.
Those days shall mankind Vince over its incompetent self and develop in a way that every successful species does.

There Is Something In Your Eyes

there is something in your eyes..

something soft ..

something smooth

yet demanding

there is something

that pulls me past

those enchanting eyes

there is something that rips apart

my amour of repelant sighs

there is something i still remember

gazing into for the first time

that something held me almost forever

as long as my nine lives

there was something i don't know

that still tucks my heart

something comes mid at night

in the dream of a weeping heart

then by those eyes again

do you look at me

i feel like drowning forever

feels like a paradise sea

they take me by their magical strands

of promises to stand aside

they say there is a wide land

a land where my heart can play high

they ask me to hold hands

hands i cannot see

for you cant blame my poor eyes

it's yours that don't let me see

there is something in those eyes

something i cant deny

someplace where i reside

the solace of my last cry

those eyes i tell thou

never gaze in to the mirror

so deep is thou art

shall yourself you

get lost forever

God A Blunder

God, the reason why the first letter in the word that initiates this article is capital, is merely that it’s a convention to start a sentence with a capital letter. This was to tell you what this article is exactly headed to. I rather like it as god, simple, sober, unglorified and away for whatever poses a threat to overdo the image of an ambiance so pure in its nature. The heading itself must have suggested what this humble author of yours is trying to convey and for many I may appear to be an atheist. Let me put this in the very beginning that I am a human as normal as anyone reading this in any corner of this self occupied unheavnly earth. All I condemn is ideologies, all I refute from is blindness, not helpless blindness but blindness we all have forced ourselves into. A blindness that has cost us a lot now seems to be poised to do the same to our children. I talk of not religion but ideologies; I talk of not the epics that state but the mindsets that awake a sense that needs to stay asleep, a sense of achievement of something that, to us has been posed as the reliever of all pain. This sense of achievement do I call today’s GOD and this very sense do I call a blunder. All of us have been brought up in an environment that makes us addicted towards seeking refuge to a deity that according to us is a solution to every single situation that to us seems unsolvable. This according to me is one of the most pathetic arguments that a tactful escapist can make and the most unfundamental of all the reasoning that forms the foundations of this so explainable universe. All these years we have not just carried forward, but forged this blunder, more and more. Denser every time it is recalled, recalled in terms of festivals events traditions or maybe daily prayers. It has become the very part and parcel of our living a normal life. The biggest irony of the situation being that, people refrain from being non-believers just by the fear of the entity that they do not believe. Today to exist and more importantly to, in true sense, develop and evolve we must give up sheer faith and resort to pure logic. The aim behind such an audacious statement is just that the world order at present will not let such beliefs prevail. By saying world order I mean not the economies or international institutions but the intellect of the people.
One more point that I am drawn to talk about is the human behavior and attitude and of how exactly it affects the topic we are focused on. Man has a tendency to form speculations, regarding all that happens around him. It is his normal tendency to formulate reasons to all that occurs or affects his surroundings. This very tendency is what has led to the formation of what we call rationalism. This very tendency has led to formation of modern science and reasoning. But the story doesn’t end here. We then tried explaining all that is around us without realizing that we were still not equipped enough to do that. This then led to a frustration amongst us, the frustration that arises within any little kid unable to solve his puzzles. The attempt to prove mankind above any other organism was ceased when it saw the incompetence of reasoning for a lot that that was occurring in nature. This very sense of incompetence led to the formulation of random theories to support the happenings and the most appropriate theory that cropped up was what we today call GOD. My statements may seem as another atheist blinded by rationalism trying to devastate all around him that is not supported by science but think once again. What good have we done to ourselves by believing? Just created plethora of limitations for thinking beyond the common perception? All we have created is a dome, a dome of a common mindset. All out of which has been stated as unearthly, unreal, ominous or any other such adjective created by one of my rival mates. It is quite evident that we live in a world of presumptions, a world that has always tried to explain rather than perceive. I agree that there do exist phenomena, and people that our rational thinking has not been able to explain but that holds not ground valid enough to plot supernatural powers as a reason. All that we can do is search for a reason.
All my words may seem hard to follow and to be believed in, to you, I may seem like a person so raw at reason that soaks away all the joy of faith but perhaps a language of words is something that is pushing me back from telling what I want to convey. God himself is not a misconception but the idea of his presence in things that people state is what the blunder is. God is not an omnipresent entity, he is no supernatural power who can come into your life and mend all that you want to be, your way. That is the blunder we are making. In fact looking again from a very rational point of view, we have been given this life in order to be enjoyed to the fullest. To be taken as a mystic journey to the ultimate truth. But rather what we do is something which is not even just a mistake. As the ever inquisitive man, we try to analyze our life. The problems we face and the situations that we fall in. Analysis leads to complication and this very complication leads to confusion, this confusion then increments the frustration of the analyzer and ultimately leads to stress and mental disorders that cause all the problems that arise evidently due to a restless mind.
I won’t go too long but all that we need to realize is that we are not supposed scrutinize our happenings but rather understand their importance in making us who we are and who we actually should be. This world is full of happiness, joy, rhythm, compassion and a never ending mystery of events. May be one day I will wake up, have an epiphany and tell you where we are from, but till then just stick to your cerebrum, keep thinking, don’t let your pituitary and hippocampus play games with you. Because it has been long that we have been creating these blunders, long since we have realized that someday we will have to face the man in the mirror, someday we will have to face the reality of being alone or rather self contained. We will have to understand the need of realizing one’s own self rather than running after this fallacy called god and this blunder called religion.
We are humans, one of the most evolved animals on this planet and it is a sheer pity to see ourselves still stuck in such notions of what a person like me may call a very bogus approach. As I end it, I would not like to be called repetitive in my sentences for all those saying it still need to read this once again.

If God Was Bribed

hey friends!!
this is a poem i wrote lately...
as i had developed a taste for satires...
so do tell me if you like it..
it plunges to a very grave problem of today's Indian society and only we can mend it..
make it what we want it to be...


What would follow if god was bribed
What if Karma counted on papers,
Be ignored if the god was bribed

What if, were rates for souls to go
To bodies that they liked the most
Some be humans, some be birds,
And some by bribes would be feathered

What if god didn't know honesty
Truth and lie, good or bad,
What if the ethics that rest today
Higher than any entity today
Be shattered into pieces
Ignored like a cur on thy way to destiny

What if those unable to bribe
Be sent to hell again to die

And what if the castes spread across the globe
play favoritism at the Supreme's door

Catholics say we go first,
But Brahmins have their own thirst
The Clergies say, "Give us the way!"
And the Pharaohs say,"today's our day"

What if then the guards at the door
The supreme personality's door
Again be bribed for a fast try
By the claimers of the "caste cry"

What if the souls come out pale
Unfortunate not able to pay
What the supreme demanded
For a cause so unwanted!

But in middle of this whole hub
did you the reader think once,

What with shall the God be bribed..?

Money or gold
Or wallets that unfold
Sweets or foods
Or favors or goods?
What beyond our imagination
Is enough for the god's seduction?

Think till your brains rust
And think what is the god's lust

When you find an answer, to my place do drive
Together we shall give the god a bribe.